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When Valentine’s might not mean SEXY time!

It’s the season of love- SEXY time!
Many will be getting their “swerve” on this Valetine’s day week (yeah to pregnant and post-partum clients) but for many Post-partum moms it’s not that easy. For many, they dread it!

🔸️First off for most women, sex is NOT at the forefront of their mind…their newborn is!💯

🔸️Secondly, most women are lacking sleep and if you ask them what they most want, I guarantee it would be this…sorry fellas 🤷🏾‍♀️

🔸️Up to 30% of women will have sexual dysfunction post partum
That’s 1 in 3 women…that’s ALOT!!!!!

There may be several reasons why women hurt with intercourse, whether it be through birth trauma, pelvic organ prolapse or other causes. Likewise, there can be several recommendations made. But ultimately, this is something that needs to be addressed on an individual basis. Cookie cutter definitely won’t work here!

So here are my top 4 suggestions:
1. Seek out a pelvic health physical therapist. Not only are we experts on the musculoskeletal system but we are highly trained in pelvic health including internal assessments which is highly necessary to really identify specific issues whether they be specific to the pelvic floor muscles or the other anatomical structures, including bones, joints and ligaments.

2. Understand that intimacy does not equal intercourse. While intercourse may be painful there are several ways that you can continue to be intimate with your spouse. There is emotional intimacy, being present, listening, being attentive to needs. Then there is physical intimacy which includes things like touch and penetration/ intercourse. Touch is a very powerful thing! Exploring the inner thighs, low back, neck and other areas of sensitivity may bring immense pleasure. Don’t give up because you cannot tolerate penetration and spouses do not give up on your lady…PLEASE!

3. To piggy-back off of number 2. Reframe your idea of pain. When do you hurt? Where do you hurt? Do some investigating on your own. Does it hurt at the thought of sex? Does it hurt with penetration? With thrusting? Or after? Is it positional? Try different positions, you might find that some don’t cause you pain and this can be very helpful information for your clinicians.
Consider the site: Christian Friendly Sex Positions
(Don’t be deterred by the name, it is truly a great resource). Also consider sexual therapists as another resource. You can find certified professionals listed here in your area: AASECT- Sexual Educators, Counselors and Therapists

4. Lubricate! One of the many things post partum women will deal with after pregnancy is their body trying to regulate hormones. If you are breastfeeding your estrogen levels will be a bit low and this can result in decreased vaginal secretions or dryness. There are several lubricant options. One of my favorites is Slippery Stuff which I use with all of my clients. Good Clean Love as well YES which comes not only as a water based lubricant but they also carry a vaginal moisturizer.

Sexual dysfunction may be common, but it, like many other pelvic floor dysfunctions is not normal! Know that there is help and resources available and that YOU don’t have to suffer.

If you have more questions, click here to schedule a COMPLIMENTARY call.

Yours in Health,

Dr. J


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